How to Increase your Child’s Emotional Intelligence:
Article by Sarah Tun, layperson, teacher, parent
I am a step parent and a parent. I have read voraciously of psychology, inner healing and personal growth (including some words I've authored myself). From my own experience, I share below...
When my child was an infant and toddler, I taught him to see himself – what he was wearing, including the colours and how they matched. I encouraged him to look at his facial expressions and mine... had him smile, frown and attach words to the expressions.
As our children grow, we can teach them to notice other people’s expressions, and show them pictures of people and ask what feelings are shown on the faces of the people. We can correct them if they are way off base, by gently steering them in a direction that is more accurate.
When my child was an infant and toddler, I taught him to see himself – what he was wearing, including the colours and how they matched. I encouraged him to look at his facial expressions and mine... had him smile, frown and attach words to the expressions.
As our children grow, we can teach them to notice other people’s expressions, and show them pictures of people and ask what feelings are shown on the faces of the people. We can correct them if they are way off base, by gently steering them in a direction that is more accurate.
Can we build in our children the ability to express and describe how they feel at any given time as they are growing up? When we use moments where emotions are strong or dynamic, and give a label to the feelings being expressed, this helps a child to develop vocabulary
to match the different feelings he experiences or sees in others.
As your children are growing up, ask them to
observe other people and to think about how the other people might be feeling based on their posture and facial expressions, and the words or tone of voice they are using.
From time to time, ask what she is thinking about and how she's feeling. Help him to describe how he feels and encourage him to stretch
his vocabulary about feelings. Can you share with your children how you are feeling, whether you are feeling cheerful, scared or sad? To help to identify
words to express different facial expressions, energy levels, or vocal volume, will enable children to grow in their emotional awareness. Can you be open with them (to an age-appropriate level) if they express an awareness toward your feelings, so that their innate ability is encouraged? Children will have an ability to sense your feelings, and personally, I advocate encouraging that ability, even when it might not be appropriate to give details about your own emotional state. We don't want to burden our children, yet we don't want to confuse them either, and being honest is the best way to help them trust their own innate sensitivities.
Let's encourage our children to discover the range of emotions that they feel, a variety of expressions that they use, different energy levels that they exhibit. Why? Because a child who is not only able to express his emotions but to identify them has the potential to become more sensitive to others, and kinder and more compassionate.
Let's encourage our children to discover the range of emotions that they feel, a variety of expressions that they use, different energy levels that they exhibit. Why? Because a child who is not only able to express his emotions but to identify them has the potential to become more sensitive to others, and kinder and more compassionate.
A word of
caution: It is possible to develop a child’s EQ to the point of their being
preoccupied with themselves. Let's also ensure they recognize the feelings of others as well. Remind them to look out and to look up, at their world and
toward the sky and heavens, so they are taken outside of themselves, becoming
aware of the world around them, and reminded that God is witness to their
experiences and that they are not alone.
Love and God bless to you this week. See you next Thursday... AND:
END NOTE: For those who haven't known me for long, and perhaps for some who have: You might enjoy my other blog:
Life from the Lighthouse -- all about what God shows me when He talks to me and I listen. New posts monthly on the 1st.
My website for the Self Publishing House is www.LarusPress.com where I blog on wholeness, witness, the Word of God and worship & warfare. Larus Press offers Christian-based books, blogs and literature to inspire, encourage, equip and empower your living spirit.
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